Berdwin's PDA Contents

2003-05-08T21:27:00.000-07:00

Wish List

kung fu jesus
diamond cut juicebar

2003-05-08T21:26:00.000-07:00

Poo
1480 am radio, 8 to 10 pm

sex: an expression of emotions through physical activity.

morphadite: someone who is male & female.

1. You need to pay your taxes.
2. What kind of taxes?
1. State taxes.
2. All I've got are thumb tacks. Is that ok?

2003-05-08T21:25:00.000-07:00

ooskies
Breathe in new energy and push away the negative.

2003-05-08T21:24:00.001-07:00

GIVENCHY

i pick up your hand...turtle...lyrics

I want to smell beauty, I want to taste love. I want to be overwhelmed.

I want a view where I can see a tree, or water.

2003-05-08T21:24:00.000-07:00

Flik
emptiness follows me wherever i go.
emptiness consumes me; swallows me whole.
One person to thank would have to be,
one person to thank would have to be me.
A series of psychotic episodes followed by a strange and unusual world, that of which is accompanied with music for the happy side of life.

It's a nightmare, tech support.

2003-05-08T21:23:00.001-07:00

““““
Play with things and flap with wings,
I love to see them in their place.
Journey by the high blue sky,
Dream of your sweet lovely face.

Liquid dreams of sci fi slip through my happy place.

A guy and his girl,
A sun and her world.
A grind and his punch,
A back and her hunch.

2003-05-08T21:23:00.000-07:00

:::descriptivally stunning:::
Bright and colorful spiders that taste like sugary fruit.

Prepare to be amazed by the hypnotic dots of fame!!!

A gift basket that has shaving cream, underwear and beef jerky.

High priced fecal matter from South East Asia.

A personal holographic interface to serve all your needs.

Pink ribbon smoke that smells like candy.

2003-05-08T21:22:00.000-07:00

- -
Where I stand, there is a wall. I cannot move, for there is a wall. A wall surrounds me completely and I stand cold. My future relies upon the wall. I don't exist because of the wall. That is all.

My insides are churning a toxic gas. Beware.

The bug in my throat pops and the trickling poison expands in my stomach. I wonder when and if I'll die from this or from the man with the gun.

I want your soul. I will eat your soul.
Come to Daddy.

Let there be QUAKE. Let there be QUAKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2003-05-08T21:21:00.000-07:00

Your name is Tyler Durden.
The air surrounding you is hot and moist. A flushing river of white noise trickles electricity into the back of your neck, causing you to clear your mind of all outside thoughts. All color is lost and your astral body gets sweeped away from your physical body and you enter your cave. That's right, your cave. But your "cave" is simply a metaphore for The Truth. The truth is that you aren't really who you physically appear to be. You are a bright white pinpoint of light that uses a physically mobile vehicle as a mode of transportation. Without this vehicle you can't open doors, wash a batch of laundry or do anything physically possible for that matter. You can still learn without a body, but you can't apply what you've learned to anything. You also cannot evolve your interest in things. Without a body, you can't get Fly Miles and Cash Back Bonuses. You can't deposit birthday money into a checking account or email your friend pictures that you took on a trip. Without a body, you have no life.

2003-05-08T21:20:00.001-07:00

You.
You are a monkey, ready to be fragged.
You.
You are a robot, ready to be fragged.
As for me, I have to suffer from this crap music.
Now I have a headache, thanks to the lava.
Your eyes aren't as feminine as I hoped. I was realy aiming for feminine.
I now feel the warm sun on the back of my neck.
How fortunate of me.

2003-05-08T21:20:00.000-07:00

Twirl.
Just kidding, that word is gay.

riding in the car, riding in the car... goin' to a dumb restraunt clear in the mountain... la di da, poopfart poo... I wanna' be home before two... just kidding, I like nine better... oh, the stink; the stink, the stink! lights, small ones, from a distance... I want a hamburger as thick as your thighs, deep as your eyes, sweet as your pies, long as your lies, blue as your skys, soft as your sighs, as white as your palms that grow on trees! with ease!!
fat, smoked women who make our food. they smell like trash and have yellow saggy boobs. DEMONS ARE EVIL, DEMONS MUST DIE!!! Stick 'em in the eye!

SMOAKING: controlled decay.

you think it's my chicken? My bum feelzs sick. I need a 303. What is that? Your'e weird. I think those f*ckn' dipsh*t rap faggots should be tortured with pain and live forever.

2003-05-08T21:19:00.000-07:00

Song:::

Brit-ney Lee
you once belonged to me
but now you're gone
you belong to another Shaun

i remember
when we used to drink hot chocolate
next to the sun
we had just begun
everything was spun
i had forgotten how to love
and like death from above
i had gone
and ruined our friendship
and now i feel like shiz

with sugar and lace
she touched my face
i hit the ground
the blood ran down
impaled by smoak
she began to choak
the scent of a whale
i always fail

i cannot be your lover
you know, because
you love another?
Oh yes, i know
i am gone
your new boy's name
his name is Shaun

because she's a sunshine girl in a sunshine world
everytime I look at her it makes me want to hurl

2003-05-08T21:18:00.000-07:00

sin.
Sin is where the heart is. Anyway, that's how it is in Las Vegas. There are demons everywhere! Ones with blood & flesh hanging from the rims of their teeth. You can smell sex if you get close enough or even look down. Then your eyes suck the poisen into your nasal, causing beads of blood to accumulate upon your glossy view. The power-driven stare from those carnivorous beasts leaves you no choice but to make haste to escape hate.

2003-05-08T21:17:00.000-07:00

My browser,
I've seemed to have lost my browser.

Misplaced scents of beauty-cute purfume has coated itself upon my mind. I can't believe we're going there again; either Red Robin or Alaska. It doesn't matter. I wish someone could go with me to Alaska, because the last time I went there I was alone. I'm always alone. Why is this? Well, for obvious reasons; I don't talk much, I don't smile too much, I'm anti-social, I don't share the popular interests of others, .. Uh, I'm sure there are a lot more other reasons, I'm just too lazy to write them down or think of them right now.
My batteries are going dead because it's always too dark... The backlight takes up a lot of power. That just shows how dark this world is. Ha ha.
Where's the madness? I was expecting some real fun after Y2K. But no, things just have to continue sucking.

2003-05-08T21:16:00.001-07:00

HELP
Remember:::
You must remember the past and find reasons why she doesn't want you.

Plus... You can't be mad at someone because they don't love you.

2003-05-08T21:16:00.000-07:00

Everything said to be mine does not attribute to my happiness. Without that which is said to be mine, I have no hapiness. I might as well not even have anything.

She doesn't even care to know that you're there.

2003-05-08T21:15:00.000-07:00

0
it's my cancer
it's my disease
it's my everything that crushes me

Would you like to see the inside of my soul?

No such thing as love.

It doesn't matter as I get older
It doesn't matter as I get colder

i am a diseased heap of worm carcus' that rots and smells to cause death across the dark valley. the lime blue sky overheads and cracks agaist my skull, ripping my soul.

2003-05-08T21:14:00.001-07:00

They are special
The inhabitants of Park City, Utah are wealthy, rude, stuck-up demons who refuse to live like the rest of us. Well, you know how all those famous people are? They're just like beasts who live in PC.

2003-05-08T21:14:00.000-07:00

The aliens might come and give us candy and show us how to levitate large objects with our minds.

You'll want to concentrate on pulling on one of your arms repeating the phrase "come on, come on...". I came so close that I actually felt my "astral" arm stretching from the middle outward. Very cool.
I later tried it again the same night but I was far too tired to come remotely close. The breathing exercises are only to give you enough energy to get out. Make sure you have plenty of energy in order to get out.

Bring us our dinner, you stupid waitress!! You know, we ARE starving to death. I don't care how 'idiot savant' you are, I want my food. And if it's cold, you're going to die. But wait, it's not sizzling. This IS Sizzler, isn't it? Irony at a medium speed.
WTF?!!

It's funny that we're here with our entire "system" and that at the same time, we're not here for that. This goes for government, religion, careers, etc.

2003-05-08T21:12:00.000-07:00

Revisit
pc berdwin

"For why do you not speak to me?",
A childish manner acted she.
For there a request awaits to be heard
from a small child, the size of a bird.

A distance so great, so tired she was.
Covered in lint, velvet and fuzz.
Glowing, just so, in ambient haze,
So beautiful, she was, in so many ways.

2003-05-08T21:11:00.000-07:00

Reincarnation
It was a thousand years since he was first created as an exsting being in the infinate cycle of the Universe. So many lives had he lived, so many people he had been. This time he was a business man in the state of Utah in the United States on planet Earth. His name was Jule Bennett. A single man of 32 lived alone, though accompanied by his cat Vannessa, in an apartment located in the city of Orem.
Jule was an pleonastic daydreamer and also loved computers. He liked to create on his computer the fantastic worlds that which had been born in his mind. This for him was total bliss as well as daily life. He truly felt that this was heaven on earth. The worlds he created were third dementional and were composed of polygons and surface maps.

2003-05-08T21:10:00.000-07:00

Ramping Clouds
Octavious, first planet of the eighth galaxy. Nephrikah, temple lands of Octavious, the place of which I came. I, the subconcious, was named Visathamous and created as a protector of early civilizations on other planets. I have only a name for the references of beings not of my intelligence, though am nameless otherwise. I have incarnated three times after my first, which was on Octavious; the others on planets located far, far away. I am currently living my fourth life on Earth.

2003-05-08T21:09:00.000-07:00

Manifestations
••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
But with her eyes she uses to set you into a web of chaos, you end up choaking on medical fluids of white and yellow pigment. More than this, your vision is blured and you only realize how true her eyes are to you. Your skin feels as though it will burst open, exposing the accumulated disease that stiffens your ability to move.
3/20/00 8:19 am

The power goes out after an emense wind storm and you can't taste anything at all because there is no color in the things you touch, there is no flavor in the things you see.
Now: 3/20/00 7:40 pm

Most likely you will be doing the work of others, not of your own. They own everything within the boundries, including you. You are a prisoner that does not see truth when the truth is out there. You are being held captive by the United States government.
3/21/00 7:55 am

Shimmering green velvetine gel hums and moves at vigorous speed without anyone noticing. An orange block of reflective jolf makes good use to a mass colony of object oriented Reticulans from a deep space that we call home.
3/28/00 8:01 pm

Non-alcoholic champaigne foam (of pinkish colour)bubbles accross the surface of a beach of honey along with the ships and clouds of wet air in the ocean beyond the reality that stands before you at this present time. This taste is so familliar to me as I have once owned memories as these, but they aren't of this place.
3/30/00 8:09 am

2003-05-08T21:06:00.001-07:00

I Dreamed of Mars

One time there was a girl named Kaseah. She lived on a colonization based on the giant red cliffs of the Mars canyons. Kaseah didn't have any friends and spent most of her time daydreaming while staring vacantly into the vast red dirt of endless nothing. She decided that she would set out on a venture to meet some friends that shared interests such as hers, which were various amounts of endless data. "Endless", a favorite word of Kaseah's, was used a lot in her daydreaming. Anyway, while walking down a hallway, which was illuminated with red mars light, there was a tremendously loud bang. The floor shook and so did everything else around her. Kaseah had been, unsurprisingly, daydreaming right as she was walking. So she was pretty not with "it" at this moment. Suddenly, a storm of strange looking soldier-like men came marching at a fast pace in a very organized line down the hall toward her. They were carrying enormous guns and were wearing black shiny metal helmets masking their identity. Kaseah was having a hard time breathing since realizing then that they were heading straight for her! Kaseah, still standing, covered her arms over her head and clenched her eyes tight. She felt a giant arm wrap around her side and she was instantly lifted above the ground. She dared not open her eyes for the fear of what was happening to her. She then began to think about looking out the window and dreaming of a blue sky with green grass. This was part of a memory she had from when she was very young. She grew this memory in her mind (my means of making what wasn't real) into a dream that she could experience as real as anything she could see in everyday life. The dream was where she walked slowly across the grass with her bare feet flattening the thickness below her. "What a plain and boring dream this is." she thought. "I will do some--." She stopped at once as she felt cold metal slam against her back and bright lights were shown directly into her eyes. A tear ran down the left side of her head into her hair as she tried to make out what was going on, now that she wasn't dreaming anymore. The soldiers sat in silence as they looked in one direction, as it seemed that they and Kaseah were in a vehicle of some sort and moving as well. Their guns bobbed up and down and left and right as the speed of the transportation device became faster and faster. Kaseah had the bravery to utter the question, "Where the hell are you taking me?" All of the soldiers, that were in her view, looked down at her quickly, as if she had said something terribly wrong. Once soldier spoke up in a language that Kaseah did not understand. "What? I'm sorry, I don't understand. Do you speak English?" "Meheos isoa dmox ewos do osod iso modisa!!" the soldier repeated in a harsh, low voice. The soldier then looked up in the direction that the vehicle was moving and pointed. "Falxu aoso iso movs do isodo micha." said the soldier. All the other soldiers looked up just as he said this strange unknown phrase. Kaseah tried to tilt her head backward, as she was lying on her back, to see what they were looking at. She saw that they were in space and traveling quite fast! Everything upside down seemed to be confusing to Kaseah, so she turned over on her belly. One of the soldiers pressed their foot on her back firmly just as she turned. "Ouch! What ARE you doing?!" cried Kaseah. Suddenly, everything went pitch black, and Kaseah opened her eyes. She was right back where she started just a few minutes ago when dreaming out the window at the Martian landscape. "It must have all been just a dream!" thought Kaseah. She then got up and decided that she had better find some friends before anything else weird would happen. Things could get dangerous.
END

2003-05-08T21:06:00.000-07:00

Homestyle fries are good to eat.

Once was there filth that shown land to be covered as thick as metal. Blood like rain drolled their eyes in an infant-like violence.

There was once .. greasey smelling frenchfries!

2003-05-08T21:04:00.000-07:00

Futuristic Block of Concrete::::::::
••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
This is the soon-to-be living structure of the future. Dynamically rendered in complex geometric forms and shapes, these physically stable living quarters are suspended thousands of miles above the earth. They are embeded deeply into the enormouse red cliffsides of the planet Mars. The low, flat valleys of the martian surface are no longer dry and hostile to life, but nourish it. A major project, successfully operated by the inhabitants of Earth, breathed emense vegitation and imported fresh water, containing a fair amount of aquadic life, from the moon Europa. The oxygen levels were at a decent percentage thanks to new technologies. Blues and greens, with subtle sparks of red, flow fantastically along the vally floor. Entire colonies of humans span the cliff-hung homesteads living the future! Yes, this is the future!!! Ships of metallic splendor span the atmosphere with detail accuracy! Robots with AI chips are intelligent aids, serving our wants and desires, our fantacies and conquests! Complete ecstacy dwells in the minds of men and women, soothing the aches and pains of genetic disorder. Advanced tactics for generating offspring hold strong promises for safer reproduction. Disease is no longer a threat, but a tool. War is no longer with the peace, but forgotton. War is gone, a solid blow to the genetically unstable.
It was a flaming June with light blues in the day, reds and yellows at night. Astral bodies, anchored by their physical bodies and attatched with a shiny silver cord, filled the atmosphere in a mingling spread of soft joyous play.

2003-05-08T21:02:00.001-07:00

Coldness

The sharp winter air made the skin on my face feel tight and impenetrable. I was the only entity around for at least a hundred miles, as far as I could tell. There were no mountains and there were no trees. Only rocks, dirt and small random patches of icy material. I tried not to hurry myself as the air was freezing my nostrils, windpipe and lungs. This was not the most comforting situation, as you could imagine.

2003-05-08T21:02:00.000-07:00

Be protected, if 2

The surface of Mars is red and rocky. The storms there are extremely dangerous for human living conditions.

Most major religions say that you have to (or should) be married in order to have sex or have children.

People not married will mostly have a man who leaves and the woman will have 1 baby.

People married will have 2 to 5 children, or more, and will have more children after remarriage (if there is divorce). It seems that married people have more children than non-married people.

Married people have children on purpose, while non-married people tend to have children on accident. Religion makes it okay to have children if you're married.

The Reticulians (aliens: greys) need our bodies to make reticulan/human hybrids in order to survive on the earth plane w/ the advancements that the Reticulan body has. Also, they cannot reproduce very well, but, as we all know, humans are very good at reproducing.

The more people there are in the world, the greater chance of getting a large amount of good people. The bad people will war with each other and die, but the good will hide and live on. They need to have a lot of people so there are more good people from the overall.

The human body is programmed (hormones and such) to reproduce with other human bodies.

2003-05-08T21:01:00.000-07:00

Be protected, if 1
Be protected, if you are so willing to do so.

Last night I was awakened to the loud crack coming from the Klaptune Nebula. Everyone around me heard it as well, and had questioned my higher superiors and I what it was. I told some of them "It was a worm hole being created." and the rest of them "There is nothing to be worried about." They all argued about it and then told them it was just in their imagination. My higher superior, Daghvik, laughed at me and told his higher superior about it all. I was then the life of the party. People were asking my permission if they could print my image on their durable surfaces, and I let them. It was good fun.

Enlightened old ones of the stars. Enlightened old ones don't need cars. One would say they come from sky. One would say as they fly by.

Emptiness resides within me. My skin twists and pinches my nerves. Everything is mine. I greedily take and don't ever give thanks. I am awfully twisted fate, so tight, that I am about to snap.

Sub structuralizing monuments of the beginning of the spectrum of a high tide that overpowers inflammatory snicker doodles. If this or that which circumferences the inner sanctum, then there must always contain meaning in moon flats on rhetorical body paint all over your hose candle. Ending in a resulting picture moment. "Goggle fidgets!" mind you serpentine.

My bottom tooth is bothering me,
and every time I sit down to pee,
everyone starts looking at me,
and I just want to scream.

Some things require attention more than others. For example, if you see a fat man in an office, he might be breathing deeply because he is fat. You really don't need to notice this in the fat man in the office, but you do. It would be more important to notice that you no longer have flesh on your right pointer finger. Yes, we are ignorant to the most important things in our lives.

But anyway…

Ultra contra soldiers are fighting with rockets and plasma rifles. Why is this? I do not know. Perhaps there is a perfectly good explanation for this, but on the other hand, perhaps there is not. Common sense and logic was lost in the seventies and regained in the late nineties. Why is this so? Perhaps it is because of the fact that there are no inhabitants on the moon, or, on the other hand, there are, in fact, inhabitants on the moon. They must be invisible to the human eye, because we cannot see them. Seventeen little girls dress like whores so that they will have friends who will touch them and give them pleasure. That is most likely why there are so many. If I were a little girl, I would most certainly wrap a thousand items of clothing on my body so there would be no little boys trying to touch me and give me pleasure. If I were a girl, I would be a lesbian. But that's easy for me to say.

I suppose this will all end when the reset button is to be pushed by someone or something. Pushed not for me alone, but for all of us. This way everything will be different in the end, or should I say, the beginning.

The beginning. I was hurt badly on my right shoulder and was having a hard time coping with the pain. I believe it was a piece of flying rock or concrete or something that hit me, but I am not certain. The wound was about one centimeter deep, from what I could tell, and blood had soaked down my shirt and started onto my pants. I was still in my work clothes since it was during work when the whole mess started. I was sitting in my office opening the mail when an enormous wave of energy hit everything, as it seemed, like an earthquake or something. Though I do think it was a flood, because of all the water. Shortly after the incident, I remember being pulled up by someone, but never really saw who it was. I was placed on some ground that was much higher than the water and had no idea where I was. But then, in my soaked clothes, I found that I was in the mountains. I can't count how many times I yelled out the word "hello". I am currently annoyed by that word. Anyway…

2003-05-08T20:52:00.000-07:00

Bad! That was bad!
§§§§§§§§§§§§§§§§§§§§§§§§§§§§§§
My nose is runny!
Champaigne and honey!
You know the rest!
She takes off her vest!
Shiny blue carpet!
I walk down the maket!
Take it off slow!
You know where to go!
No more insane!
Make them laugh in vain!
Without a thought!
He makes them a robot!
Incoherant structure!
Stop calling me, buster!
She lets out a fart!
That fills up the cart!
Snow in July!
Naked women fly by!
Honey and mustard!
The boy throws upward!
More satisfaction!
She got laid in Manhatten!
Sex underneith!
He sucks on her teeth!
Lost and at home!
He's home all alone!
He doesn't care!
She's in her underwear!
Hugs and kisses!
Those things that he misses!
To comfort his soul!
She consumes him whole!
Vicious brutality!
They see their reality!
And feel really bad!
The love they never had!

2003-05-08T20:51:00.000-07:00

A man had recently traveled into the future. At first the world seemed mad, but eventually grew accustom to his liking and interest. His epic tale tells of a place that defys existance as you know it: This is the future.

The year is now 2002 and is the seventh month of twelve. Charleston Berdwin, a dreamer in his early twenties, is having the time of his life and wishes it to be different. He wishes he didn't have to work. He wishes he didn't have to go to school. He wishes to be free of this real prison that surrounds him, keeping him down and holding him captive. Charleston wants to be his own god where he can exist freely to his liking. This world he exists in has rules and restrictions. Charleston believes that the only way he can be free is if he kills himself but will be punished if he does so, though he does not know this for sure. How to be sure, though? Charleston believes that rules and restrictions have to be created in order to exist. Then who is the author of this place? He needs these answers so much that he is able to influence his subconscience in such a way that he is able to manifest a wormhole through time. The subconscience is a very powerful thing.
One morning, Charleston Berdwin is going mad in his bed, tearing at his head. He rips and rolls and

2003-05-08T20:49:00.001-07:00

°.°.°.°.Flowing.°.°.°.°
I frequently have flying or floating experiances in my dreams where I will fly where ever I want at what ever speed I want, or just float in one place. Whenever I do so I get a sort of weird feeling in my belly or the center of my body. These sensations are so real that I feel as though I could actually perform these acts in real life. Sometimes I will need to go somewhere and my body just isn't traveling fast enough. I feel the need to burst out of my body and move at lightning speed, but instead I have this blockade to restrict me from escaping. Perhaps I am being taught how to fly by some outside force or being. For what purpose?

2003-05-08T20:49:00.000-07:00

:::Revealed::
No clouds, only space. An infinate span of blue and green press at horizon. On the line, a small smooth tree with a spherical top. Slowly moving towards the tree. Slowly, you become smaller as the tree gets bigger. All peace shines frome the tree, filling you with bright streams of light. Everything perfect, everything right. You have found yourself, the tree, the sky, the grass. You were meant for this, as everything for you. Just when it was getting good, a loud crack is heard from the sky. You look up and see a white line splitting the sky. The line grows wider and you watch in awe as it consumes over half the sky. There is a tremendous amount of light everywhere that overcomes the light which you posessed before. That now is gone. Suddenly, a dense tumbling noise is heard from behind you. You violently turn around to see what it is and you find yourself falling rappidly to the earth and into a block of buildings. Everything is now black and silent. You attempt to open your eyes but nothing is there. This "nothing" lasts for about nine minutes. But then the world opens up and you see two beautiful blue eyes, looking into you deeply. You then realize that you have been reborn. So that's what was happening! Now you know the truth. -END-

2003-05-08T20:45:00.000-07:00

$not-Panntz
Fender bender, taco vendor.
Monkey splendor, carwash spender.
Red light, blue sky.
Green light, cow pie.
Church boy, gay boy.
Pink toy, deploy.